He Cares

How are you?
not just good, I mean how are you really?
The real question is: how's life?

The point is that everyone has struggles.

This past fall, I was a lead in a play. My character was a selfish, confused, ignorant, and strong willed teenage girl who had just lost her father. She struggles throughout the play about God and who He is, if He cares, or if He even exists. At one point in her struggle, she tells the doctor, whom she has grown quite fond of, that "He cares more about the sparrows than He does about us."

At times this may seem very true, but it's not. In Matthew 10:29 we see that we are worth more than many sparrows.

The truth is... He Cares.

Jeremiah 29:11--- For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

One struggle that is very close to me now is about my grandad, Babbo. He was diagnosed with alzheimer's disease in 2004. If you don't know what that is, it is a disease in the brain where neurons become ineffective. It starts by affecting the person's memory and mental complexity, then moves to confusion, and then moves into the muscles. There is no cure and no way to stop it, so basically you watch your family member dying while they are still alive.

If you have ever seen Lonesome Dove, Babbo was almost exactly like the character Gus. He was always strong willed, hardworking, friendly to everyone, and loved cold PBRs. Now, Babbo still remembers my name, but mainly sits at his breakfast table alone staring out the window at a wall all day. He can't remember what he did 20 minutes before or who he ate dinner with once he returns home. And recently he has had a hard time swallowing. He can't eat much and his food has to be mashed up. He struggles to even drink half a beer (which was his favorite).

I know that he is not getting better, but I know God will take care of him and me. I know that this rough experience today will help me with an event I will face tomorrow. It's true that now I don't understand why this has to happen, but I do understand that the outcome will be His perfect will. And there is nothing better than that.

Life

The last night I was in Haiti over Christmas break was New Year's Eve. Father Bruno, the famous Haitian Priest held a service at 11 to usher in the New Year. I just wanted to share a little bit of what he had to say which I hope you will be able to translate to your own lives.

2010 was clearly a bad year for Haiti:
Earthquake- claimed many lives
Hurricane- affected many countries
Cholera- claims many lives every day

We gather because we could have been the people to die.

We all are subject to time. No matter what we do, time moves on, and so must we. Every day we gain more experience to build our lives around, but how do we live?

A person who lives a good life follows God.

If you have understanding, you will see the only thing you need is Him.

Everyday we have the oppertunity to do something new. We are able to start over.

We have to change, and if we are unhappy, we must find the way to Jesus. With Jesus anything is possible. With Jesus we are able to make sense out of our lives.

I hope this inspires you for the new year. I want to leave you with a little quote from one of the hardest working and accomplished men I know. Whenever we would praise him for all the good he had done, he would just give us kind of a puzzled look and say, "No, It's not me, not me at all. It's my Jesus. Without my best friend, Jesus, I could not do anything."

Stream of Life

About a month ago, I was at a retreat and we had free time. And as usual with my free time, I decided to wander off and this time along the creek up stream. It was quite adventerous and exciting as well as overall peaceful, challenging, and quiet. I started out with one of my distant friends. Quickly I realized this travel would be a metaphor for my walk and also my life in general. He started with shoes and soon found it hard to go as quickly and agilely as I. At certain points he caught up and even took the lead, but I soon took the lead once again. Times were hard, especially when neither of us could help the other. At certain points we had to get wet, we had to get dirty and wade through to get to the next step. At a point, he told me he had to turn back. Although I thought he could stay longer, I knew he must leave if that be his will and even though it would be a lonely and even more difficult road ahead, I had to let him go. After he left, I proceeded on my journey and as I had imagined, it was much lonelier, slower, and more difficult, but I pushed through. I began to enjoy this time and see it as a blessing, a time for me to focus and think and let go of the world. I soon found myself scaling vertical rock faces and passing easily over waterfalls. The small troubles I once viewed as mountains now seemed like dust. My fear and frustration stood no more, I was in near perfect peace. Through this, I learned that struggles are not given to us as a punishment, we unconsciously seek them out, it is our nature, they are a part of the journey we must make. They are given to us as blessings, though we cannot see at the time, God gives us these hard times to help us, to strengthen us because it is in these desperate times that we meet his Love and Grace face to face. It is in these times that we allow Him to hold us. We learn and we grow. The greatest knowledge is found not in our victories but through our greatest losses.

Peace and Love

As I sat in a tree, away from technology, people, the world, I felt His presence. I just thought about what God has done for me and thanked Him for everything. I saw these bright wings covering me and I felt his love so clearly. Then I looked at the mountain and saw bright light coming over the top. I thought about the town and wondered how many people knew what Jesus had done for them. God is not only wanting us and waiting for us, but is seeking after us and running to us as we return home. As we come to Him and realize His love for us, we want others to feel the joy we feel as well; we want to share His love with others. I tend to want to actively with myself in control try to help people, but this cannot be done. We cant help people on our own and shouldn’t try. As we grow closer to Him, it will come naturally that His light inside us will shine forth. It is so rewarding to see others accept this love, especially those who you have consistently prayed for but we must let go and let God!

Not a Victim, a Volunteer

For those of you who know what Jesus did for us, this will be a completely different view, for those who haven’t, I hope this will be very inspiring and life changing. Jesus was turned into the Roman Soldiers by one of his closest followers. Please do not feel sorry for Him; He knew what was happening and what was going to happen and was in complete control the whole time. Jesus was not a victim; He was a volunteer. Before they came to take Him, He prayed in the garden and once the soldiers came, He told them who He was and stopped His other followers from hurting them. He waited as they chained Him, could not be convicted by Pontius Pilate but was requested to be killed by the crowd who screamed “crucify him!” He was then flogged with cat-of-nine-tails (a whip with 9 straps of leather with broken glass, rocks, and metal tied on the end ripping skin off and tearing through flesh) for 39 strokes (40=death). This whole time He was in control, volunteering for this because of His great love. After being stripped, He struggled to His place of death; He was ordered to carry His own cross while being mocked. Once He reached the place of His crucifixion, He was nailed to the cross through each hand and both feet (in crucifixion you die incredibly painfully by suffocation, exhaustion, and blood loss). As He suffered on the cross, He looked at all those who loved Him, those who feared Him, those who were part of the crowd, and those who persecuted Him-EACH AND EVERY ONE, ALL OF WHICH HE LOVED. With people still mocking Him, He asked God to forgive them and with His last breath he said, “It is Finished.” Remember, the whole time He was in control, at any moment He could have sent down His legions of Angels and destroyed them all, yet He suffered so greatly completely innocent, sinless, as a volunteer. He volunteered Himself for us so that we can be with God forever because HE LOVES US!

The Mountain

Hiking up a 13,000 foot mountain really puts things into perspective. It's mostly you and the trail so you get a lot of time to think and search and persevere. Once I reached the top, it was such an amazing feeling of accomplishment. I saw the beauty of everything around me, and realized how insignificant and small I am, and yet so significant to the one who made us and will always love us beyond everything else. You know, everyone changes, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, but something that always stays constant is our need for Him and his undying love for us! No matter the struggles we face, if we persevere and keep our eyes on the goal, we will reach the top, victorious!

what? Jesus?

Believe it or not, Jesus was super strong and hung out with all the bad kids. It's funny, I know some people who think Jesus is either a super wormy dork or powerless and uncaring or some kind of Hitler type figure constantly hurting, destroying, killing, and hating people. All of these views are definitely very skewed and wrong! We have all fallen short of His glory and need Him. He actually has already sought us out, loves us, and wants a closer relationship with us, every one of us. And when you think about it, we are all the "bad kids," but I know sometimes I definitely forget other people have issues and that we all have our own stories with many bumps in the road. It is so surprising and encouraging to see that everyone is imperfect and broken no matter how powerful or old or popular or "good" and yet He still wants us; He wants shattered vases, broken lightbulbs, burned down houses, and torn dresses to fix, make new and beautiful.